


human married

by canidswain



Series: hlvrai fics inspired by my epic gamer bf [3]
Category: Half Life VR But The AI Is Self Aware
Genre: Black Mesa Sweet Voice, Dadrey, Fluff, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Wedding Fluff, parenting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-08
Updated: 2020-06-09
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:35:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24597616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/canidswain/pseuds/canidswain
Summary: Fact number one: Benrey didn't need to eat. Or sleep, for that matter. Or blink, or breathe, or anything a regular fucking human needed to survive.Fact number two: Benrey was good with kids.Fact number three: Benrey was straight to the point when he wanted to be."dude do you wanna get human married."
Relationships: Benrey/Gordon Freeman, Implied Bubby/Dr. Coomer (Half Life)
Series: hlvrai fics inspired by my epic gamer bf [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1776652
Comments: 58
Kudos: 745
Collections: HLVRAI





	1. be my player two?

**Author's Note:**

> me and my bf discussed frenrey proposals AGES ago and i was in the mood to write and an anon said i should do some frenrey proposal stuff so here we are. there MAY be another chapter to this thats the actual wedding, im not sure yet. please enjoy.

Life with Benrey was surprisingly pleasant.

He'd been living with Gordon for months now, verging on seven. In that span of time, Gordon had learnt a lot of things about the eldritch-being-turned-gamer-roommate. Some of them peculiar, some just... seemingly out-of-character for Benrey.

Fact number one: Benrey didn't need to eat. Or sleep, for that matter. Or blink, or breathe, or anything a regular fucking human needed to survive.

This was one of the things that hadn't surprised Gordon, but had alarmed him at first. He'd noticed after the third night of Benrey curled up against him in bed that the man didn't breathe. Something Gordon would never admit to was the immediate panic and reflex to begin CPR that happened when he realised this. Benrey would never let him live that one down, though.

After that, Gordon had taken to observing him, and eventually just asked. And his housemate had confirmed that no, he didn't need to do any of those things, but he did do them sometimes, because it was fun. Okay.

Fact number two: Benrey was good with kids.

At least, good with Joshua. When they'd crashed back into Gordon's apartment after the party, Joshie had been staying at his aunt's, but Gordon anticipated his return with rapidly fraying nerves.

He really didn't want Benrey to be... _Benrey_ in front of his kid. The cursing, the taunting, the irresponsible attitude, the encouragement to rebel directly against everything Gordon said - Benrey would definitely turn his own son against him. Benrey would be the direct cause of Joshua's angsty anti-parent teen phase. Gordon was absolutely certain in that regard. Benrey would poison his child's brain.

However, Benrey did none of that. Unbelievably, Benrey didn't curse, or jab, or accidentally kill Joshua. Their meeting had gone about as well as expected - _better,_ because Gordon expected absolutely fucking nothing from Benrey. Joshie had run inside, straight into his dad's arms, gone through several rounds of "airplane" before he settled down in Gordon's arms and tugged his sleeve shyly, looking towards Benrey. The creature himself shifted awkwardly, staring at Gordon's kid with wide pupils. Stepping closer, Gordon introduced Benrey to Joshua, Joshua to Benrey. His son had buried his face in the scientist's neck for a moment, whining quietly, before looking back up to Benrey and holding out a little wavering fist towards him.

"Hiii."

There had been silence after that while Benrey simply stared at it. Then, something seemed to click inside him, and he held his own fist up. "yooo, little man's already got the prime-time fistbump technique down? sick." And he bumped their fists together and sealed Gordon's fate as the victim of a Joshua-Benrey tag-team.

As much as Benrey didn't understand human children - _"Benrey, is that COD? Oh my god, turn that off! Turn it off right f- ffffudging now! That's not okay for a four year old-"_ \- he made his best effort to understand Joshua and took astonishing care with the boy. He'd ask Gordon how Joshua liked his sandwiches cut, immediately switch their TV to spongebob if Joshie ever came to sit on the couch, carry a conversation with the kid with relative ease - Gordon theorised it was because Benrey was equally as much of an immature little shit. However, the thing that plucked at Gordon's heartstrings the most was when Benrey began watching him put Joshua to bed. He thought it was just a nice gesture at first, stepping away from his game to come say goodnight.

But one day, Gordon stepped into Joshie's room to see Benrey kneeling by the bed, flawlessly tucking in and whispering to one of his son's stuffed dinosaurs.

Gordon had silently left the room and never told Benrey what he had seen, but that night he'd told his roommate that he could be the one to tuck Joshie in tonight, if he wanted to. The nonchalant expression Benrey always donned had cracked just a little, letting through the slightest tinge of excitement as he said, "sure, whatever, i'll tuck the little shit in since shitty-dad feetman's too fuckin lazy."

Gordon had the decency not to comment at the way Benrey's hands shook as he pulled the covers up over their son.

His. He meant his.

Did he?

After that, an unspoken rota was established at bedtime, switching every night. It was scary how quickly and easily Benrey slotted right into their little family routine. It was... comfortable, though. It felt right.

Months later, they were both sat on the couch, Benrey's legs draped over Gordon's. It was late, Joshua was in bed, and they were watching some shitty straight-to-DVD sequel Gordon was 99% sure he had never seen in his house before that moment. Benrey was sucking obnoxiously on a ringpop, Gordon was nearly asleep.

"dude do you wanna get human married."

Fact number three: Benrey was straight to the point when he wanted to be.

It took Gordon a moment to realise Benrey had even said anything. He snorted awake, blinking blearily over at his roommate and squinting. Benrey had taken the ringpop out of his mouth, and was simply staring at him blankly. The words stopped being muffled mess in Gordon's head and finally made some remnant of sense.

Sitting there for a moment, Gordon just stared back at Benrey. The only thing to be heard in the room was the shitty voice-acting of the animated bastard on their TV.

"... _human married?_ "

His tone was incredulous.

"..yeah, man, human married. like vows and shit. til death do us part. legally obligated to share the gamertag."

More silence. Gordon could vaguely hear an expositional monologue echoing from the TV's speakers.

"You. You wanna get married. Hold on, wait, _Jesus,_ is that even- even a thing aliens DO? Like lifelong partnership??"

Benrey rolled his eyes, "duh, course not dumbshit. that's why we're getting HUMAN married. big difference feetman keep up."

There were so many emotions brimming underneath Gordon's skin in his barely-awake state of consciousness. He realised he felt- overwhelmingly happy, for one thing. Baffled, but warm.

"I- I don't even-"

He was cut off by Benrey gently taking his left hand. For once, Gordon could see Benrey's feelings plain on his face.

He looked- He looked scared. Chewing his lip, slitted pupils darting between Gordon's face and his hand. Slowly, carefully, Benrey slid the still-wet ringpop onto Gordon's ring finger.

"be my- be my player two, bro? huh?"

Maybe it was the fact he was half-asleep, or the happiness bubbling up inside him, or the sheer fucking ludicrous nature of what Benrey just did, but whatever it was - Gordon started crying. Ugly sobbing, with his vision quickly becoming a blur and snot leaking from his nose. For a moment, Benrey looked absolutely terrified until Gordon lunged for him, pulling him close and squeezing the life out of him.

"Yes! God, fuck, you fucking idiot, yes!"

Benrey would wait until _after_ his heart stopped beating out of his chest to tease Gordon for getting snot on his shoulder, he decided.


	2. make life-ing less sucker

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A) No over-the-top fucked up massive monster shenanigans at their wedding. His sister was going to be there.
> 
> B) They were going to have nice fucking food goddamnit, no the reception bar was not going to have fucking doritos and Mt Dew. ("pussy. coward bummer buzzkill. we need that gamerfuel, babe. for- for busting epic moves on the dance floor, don't want you f-fuckin fainting on me like a little, little baby bitch cause you didnt get your gamerfuel.")
> 
> C) THEY WERE NOT HAVING THEIR WEDDING AT CHUCK E. CHEESE'S, OR ANY OTHER SHITTY CHAIN RESTAURANT THAT BENREY COULD PULL OUT OF HIS ASS. Gordon would not budge on this one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I SAID ID WRITE THE WEDDING SO I FUCKING WROTE THE WEDDING.
> 
> this fic was written for my bf, and my bf is armenian!!! and makes gordon armenian too, so i wanted to try to encorporate some armenian traditions into their wedding. i dont know how accurate any of it is because she is asleep right now and cannot tell me, but adjustments will be made depending on what she says !! stuff like the engagement party, the coins, the crowns, a red silk dress and money in the shoes are all armenian traditions (or so duckduckgo says :sob:) the money in the shoes would usually be the brother putting it in, but gordon doesnt Have a brother so abigail does it gshfsjf
> 
> ANYWAY ENJOY.

The planning had started immediately after Benrey's proposal.

Well - the day afterward. That night was spent watching the shittiest, sappiest rom-com they could find on Netflix and crashing on the couch together.

But the next day, they began planning. Gordon firmly established a few ground rules before they got too deep into preparations:

A) No over-the-top fucked up massive monster shenanigans at their wedding. His sister was going to be there.

B) They were going to have nice fucking food goddamnit, no the reception bar was not going to have fucking doritos and Mt Dew. ("pussy. coward bummer buzzkill. we need that gamerfuel, babe. for- for busting epic moves on the dance floor, don't want you f-fuckin fainting on me like a little, little baby bitch cause you didnt get your gamerfuel.")

C) THEY WERE NOT HAVING THEIR WEDDING AT CHUCK E. CHEESE'S, OR ANY OTHER SHITTY CHAIN RESTAURANT THAT BENREY COULD PULL OUT OF HIS ASS. Gordon would not budge on this one.

With those out of the way, Benrey and Gordon began thinking up venues - _"gamestop isn't a restaurant though." "WE ARE NOT HAVING OUR FUCKING WEDDING AT GAMESTOP, BENREY." "but josh, he got them discounts-"_ \- and making up a guestlist.

Their engagement party wasn't as much a party as just a quiet union in their apartment, with Joshua as witness. Gordon had to put the jewellery, dress and veil in the tray himself, but the nervy little smile on Benrey's face when he presented them made him forget that easily.

Two weeks later - a time period that quite frankly baffled Gordon in every conceivable manner - the day of their wedding came. Neither of them saw the point in wasting any time, and it wasn't like it was going to be some huge, expensive event with a mile long guest list. It was just them, a dozen friends, and... a bowling alley arcade.

Gordon sounded like a hypocrite when he refused Chuck E. Cheese's and accepted a children's bowling alley, but this place was different. After Black Mesa, the Science Team had promised to stay in touch. So shortly afterwards, they began their weekly meetings. Sometimes they'd all meet at someone's house for dinner and a game night (Gordon would never be able to scrub the "Lasagna and Just Dance 2" incident from his memory), sometimes they'd go for walks or hikes, other times they'd just meet at a park and talk.

But one week, it was Benrey's turn to pick a meeting place, and Benrey chose bowling.

Benrey was not good at bowling. This was clear from the moment he _launched_ the bowling ball down the lane and almost hit a child four lanes over. That didn't stop the night from being the most fun they'd had in a while though.

Tommy of course, with his scarily accurate aim, instantly mastered the art of bowling and succeeded in strike after strike after strike. Coomer was forced onto one of the child assistance ramps after his first shot threatened to bust a hole in the wall behind the pins. Bubby decided bowling was a waste of time and focused his energy instead on setting other families' bowling pins on fire.

Gordon and Benrey played a few rounds, but then Benrey took the scientist's hand and mumbled something in his ear, dragging him away from the group. Following with a quiet laugh, Gordon had let Benrey lead him over to the decently-stocked arcade section of the centre, and obliged in his request for a match of Street Fighter II. They spent a long time in that arcade, hopping from two-player cabinet to two-player cabinet until they ran out of multiplayers and Benrey took to watching Gordon play over his shoulder. Every so often, he'd mumble a "no, idiot, you're doing it wrong," and lean over the physicist, arms either side of him, to fiddle with the controls and rest his chin on Gordon's shoulder. Gordon's gaming skills would always get considerably worse around that point, his hands too clammy and trembling too hard to get a proper grip on the joystick.

The night had ended with a tender kiss on the back of his neck, and Gordon would get weak knees any time he passed by the bowling alley since that day.

Today, in his red silk dress, and with his sister having slipped money in his shoes, Gordon Freeman was going to be married. The excitement was making him feel sick.

The two of them had both seperately elected Tommy as their best man, so he stood at the front, beaming and flapping to his heart's content. Sunkist stood to attention next to him, a bowtie lovingly secured to her collar. Having been deemed a worthy officiant after reciting the first 30 seconds of the wikipedia page for "Marriage officiant", Coomer stood next to Tommy, exuding pride with every breath.

On the chairs before them sat the guests - a remarkably small and comfortable ensemble. Tommy's dad had been reluctantly invited, more out of fear for what would happen if he wasn't, and sat ramrod-backed in the second row. Darnold was there, talking the ear off of Forzen, who sat with a bored expression. Gordon hadn't wanted to invite him, but Benrey insisted, so here he was. There was also a skeleton sat a few seats from G-Man, presumably having been manifested by Benrey to fill out the congregation a little more, and Benrey's friend Josh - who Gordon was gobsmacked to find actually existed - lazed next to it. And finally, the wonderfully bitter-looking Bubby had parked himself on the front row to glare at Coomer for being stood at the front.

Everyone who mattered to them was here. It was a small group, but Gordon wouldn't have anyone else.

Bouncing on his heels at the front, Benrey chewed his lip and fiddled with his hands. He looked to Tommy, "y- you think it's enough, man?"

Tommy looked shocked, but the expression quickly melted into sympathy. "Benrey, he'll love it. It's okay. N-now c'mon, here he comes!"

Benrey spun back around as Mötley Crüe's Dr. Feelgood began playing on the bowling alley's speakers, just in time to see Joshua nervously shuffling down the aisle, tossing out flower petals and coins to the arcade floor. That was gonna be a bitch for the staff to clean up.

After Joshua came Gordon himself, being escorted by his sister Abigail. Benrey damn near passed out at the sight of him; clearly someone had done his hair, as it was lovingly pinned up in a loose bun behind him with delicate curls framing his face and tickling on the back of his neck, and his beard had been carefully groomed with the slightest shade of lipstick to accompany it. His dress moved with him, hiding his feet so it looked like he almost glided across the floor, and his eyes were creased with smile lines as he couldn't contain the grin on his face. Sweat collected on Benrey's brow, on the back of his neck, the nerves beginning to eat him away.

A hand gently squeezed his shoulder. Benrey didn't have to look back to know that Tommy was there, helping him all the way.

By now, Gordon's sister had let him go and was taking Joshua to their seats, and Benrey gently took Gordon's hands, facing him entirely. "you look, uh, good." That wasn't enough. "looking like, like Nariko right now. lookin heavenly as fuck, man. um."

He trailed off as the unbreakable joy on Gordon's face slowly spread to his. Oh man, he was so fucking lucky.

It took Benrey this long to realise Coomer had actually been talking, which he now tuned into - "...institution in which interpersonal relationships, usually sexual, are acknowledged or sanctioned. In some cultures, marriage is recommended or considered to be compulsory before pursuing any sexual activity. When defined broadly, marriage is considered a cultural universal. A marriage ceremony is called a wedding."

If he wasn't blushing already, he definitely was now.

Gordon cleared his throat pointedly, and Coomer immediately switched off his info-dump to properly begin the ceremony. "Ah! Welcome, everyone, to the union of our two beloved friends, Dr. Gordon Elizabeth Freeman and Benrey."

"Dr. Coomer, that's not my middle name-"

"Do we have any objections to this wonderful union?"

Dead silence, aside from the continuous ambience of bowling pins being hit and wailing children.

"Perfect!"

The ceremony continued much like this, which felt exactly right. Neither of them would want it any other way. Coomer went through the duties of marriage, the significance of their bond, and all the while they bashfully beamed at each other. After Coomer's speech, Joshua tottered to the front and read out a short poem with the help of Abigail, and after that came the vows.

Gordon was first. He clutched Benrey's hands tight, clearing his throat, and swallowing his nerves.

"Benrey. I-I know we didn't have the most, uh, _conventional_ of romances but... well, if I'm being entirely honest, man, I wouldn't have it any other way. What we've been through together, it- it taught me a lot about, um, understanding other people and- and myself, and learning to love you and all your asinine bullsh-" A cough from the audience, " _dumbness,_ has been the best experience of my life. And I'd, I'd love to spend the rest of that life with you."

A beat of quiet hung in the air between them, before a spurt of sweetvoice collided directly with Gordon's nose. He brushed it away, chuckling tearily, and Benrey prepared what he was going to say.

"feetman- uh, _gordon,_ i'm not- i'm not really good at the whole. feelings, thing, buddy? i just like, um, playing video games with my pal josh and heavenly sword new halo for sony. but you- you making me easier? wait." He took a breath, trying to switch the words around in his head. "you. make things easier. make life-ing less sucker. epic player two, best i ever had, bro. friend."

There was nothing else after that, so Gordon smiled serenely back at him and nodded gently. He did good. More sweetvoice erupted between them.

"Just beautiful! Now. Just as we will place upon them their loving union, we must also place upon them their crowns! Bubby, dear-"

Some grumbling came from Bubby as he slipped a cushion out from underneath his chair, two cardboard crowns resting upon it. He passed it up to Tommy, who held it out for Coomer.

With uncharacteristically delicate hands, Coomer picked the crowns up, and methodically lowered them onto the respective grooms' heads. The rings were also nestled in the folds of the pillow, now being taken out and exchanged. They turned back to each other then, and bumped their foreheads and crowns together with a muffled "clunk".

"I now pronounce you husband and husband, and may you rule your home with compassion at its heart."

Leaning in to finally steal a kiss from his newly-wed, Gordon blinked in surprise as Benrey pointedly leaned away from him. He moved towards Coomer, whispering in his ear before returning to their position.

"Ah! Upon amendment from our dear Benrey, I now pronounce you _human married._ "

Gordon gaped for a moment.

Then without any further delay, he broke out in raucous laughter and stole the smug look right off of Benrey's face with a kiss. Cheers erupted in the arcade around them.

 _Human married._ Gordon thought. _My husband is a huge alien dork._

\---

The reception was of course chaotic, and of course the most perfect thing Gordon could imagine. He chatted with his friends, in a rose-tinted stupor, and subjected himself to his sister's teasing remarks. Joshua was tired, so Abigail had taken to carrying him around like a sack of potatoes. No one had an issue with it, least of all Joshua.

After a while, the chaos seemed to peter out, so Gordon parked himself on one of the congregation seats and sipped lazily from a flat Dr Pepper, taken with watching Coomer and Bubby dance. He was absentmindedly wondering where Benrey had gotten to when a new track came over the speakers. This one was slow and instrumental, which confused him because they definitely had nothing of the sort on their playlist.

The scientist was about to stand and go inquire with the staff when he heard a familiar tone and stopped in his tracks. He turned in his seat, predictably spotting Benrey.. standing on top of the Street Fighter II cabinet? This would be interesting.

His new husband had a microphone clutched tight in his hands and looked quite frankly terrified. There were blue balls already floating in the air around him, but he'd stopped for some reason. Gordon found himself nodding his encouragement.

Surprise crossed Benrey's features, then reassurance, as he closed his eyes and began to sing. It wasn't English, of course, it was the gentle, melodic tones of sweetvoice. A rainbow of colour quickly spread out around Benrey, his voice pitching high and low, curving around just as the sweetvoice danced in the air. Gordon found it hypnotic, impossible to look away as the colours melted together and pulsed with soft light. It carried on for just minutes, but Gordon felt like he could have stayed in that very same spot, captivated by the lights and the tune and the love of his life, for years. There grew a heaviness in his heart when the song finally ended.

Benrey stayed up there a moment longer, so Gordon seized his chance to wave Tommy over. The man wandered over, looking just as mesmerised as Gordon had.

"Tommy, can you tell me, what did- what did any of that mean?"

Tommy pursed his lips, then looked away towards Benrey, who was still standing on top of the cabinet, watching his own sweetvoice fade into nothing.

"I don't know if I can, Mr Freeman... It'd take hours."


End file.
